Could it be you? Could you be the key? The key to what? The key to successful marriage or parenting for a another family.
You’ve probably heard the saying and scripture about training up your children in the way they should go and when they are older they won’t depart from it. But have you heard the saying and scripture that older women need to train the younger women in the areas of marriage and parenting (1 Titus 2:4)? Maybe not. I haven’t heard much about this subject in the media or on movies or in the general public. Why? Because most people only care about theirselves. They don’t have time to think about, much less train someone else. They are too worried about offending someone else, so why bother trying to help anyone.
Could this be something important missing from our society? Could this be one of the keys to put families back together? Can we turn into a society of caring for each other. Helping each other to grow. Working together. Building our communities from the ground up.
When I was a young girl I knew that I wanted to be married, and stay married. I was very blessed to have parents that didn’t divorce. Almost all of my friends went through that heartache with their families. Families being ripped apart. My friends were so traumatized. I always thought how terrible, as a kid, to have to endure that hardship. That’s how I knew I never wanted to be divorced.
My family wasn’t the perfect family, as I’m sure there aren’t too many of those out there. Yes, my parents stayed married, but it wasn’t exactly the kind of marriage I wanted. They had the common challenges that most have and never grew beyond those challenges. They didn’t have anyone to guide them.
What I did was find a family, a couple, that had the marriage that I wanted. Or that seemed to me to be “perfect”. I looked up to them in that way. I watched how they treated each other. How their family dynamics worked. Even though I never asked them for training or help, they were my one source for working on having a successful marriage. They still are.
Looking back now, I wonder if I WOULD have asked, if the wife would have been willing to impart marital wisdom to me. If she would’ve taken me under her wing. Probably. I felt a little silly ever asking though. If you’ve watched my video on how To Survive Your Family This Thanksgiving, then you would remember that I’m a person that doesn’t like to ask for help!!
What if she was willing to help and made an offer to help me? I think I would’ve taken her up on that. Did she know to offer? Was she willing? Did she know that others looked up to her marriage and family?
If you have been married for a number of years, even if only 5-10, then you are more experienced than a newly married couple. If you have struggled and came through that, then you are perfect for helping that couple. If you’ve been married for 20-30 years, and are happily married (that doesn’t mean that you don’t have struggles still or didn’t have any major challenges), then you are filled with wisdom that so many married couples NEED.
There is nothing like connecting with someone that has been in your shoes. When the impossible is faced in front of you, there is someone to hold your hand and pull you to the other side. The side of, wow, that was hard but we made it. The side of, our marriage is now stronger and we can face the next struggle together.
Don’t get me wrong, books and classes and seminars and conferences and so on are great. I love them and thrive on them sometimes, just ask my husband!! But when that book is over, when it’s time to go home from a weekend conference, who is there by your side to keep you going, to be your cheerleader?
We need more meaningful connections than Facebook! We need actual human interaction and encouragement. We need help.
We need YOU!!!
If you are a woman of overcoming, struggling, panicking, crying, mad and ready to give up, but kept and keep pursuing your marriage, then there is a woman that needs YOU!!
Here it is, my favorite thing.
I CHALLENGE YOU!!
Find a woman that needs you. And not your best friend or someone you’re already comfortable with. A young woman, that is newly married and struggling. Someone at work, in your church, a neighbor, a friend of a friend. Don’t overstep your boundaries. Just become her friend. Friendship turns into trust. Trust turns into listening. Listening turns into asking for help. Help is what they need.
But how will you connect? You don’t have anything in common. She’s 20 years younger than you. What is your common connection? Marriage.
Maybe you will find a young couple that just had children and your children are grown. You have so much wisdom, guidance and tips!! They need you! Again, what’s your connection? Parenting.
Please, if you have a perfect marriage and have never had a struggle, then this isn’t for you.
Only imperfect people need participate for this challenge!
You are needed more than ever!
Step up women of imperfect lives and marriages.
You ARE the key!
Reach out and let’s change this hurting world!
Photo Credit: (c) Can Stock Photo
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